Here are a few pop trivia to make you feel old: a few months ago Kylie Minogue became the first woman to top the UK album chart in five decades. Want to feel even older? It’s been 34 years since Kylie Minogue and Jason Donovan walked down the aisle (fictional, at least with a neighbor). It was a dreamy vision in virgin breath and flaming-looking lace; he, at the speed of a blond mullet, captured the hearts and minds of a generation of romantics.
Which in a way explains why Kylie Minogue became our version of Poor Jen. By poor Jen I mean, of course, poor Jennifer Aniston, who, despite a rather metronomic array of lavish and young lovers, always seemed a doomed gloomy narrative, that of a lonely, permanently rejected spinster. (Aniston correctly understood that perception: “First, with all due respect, I’m not heartbroken. And, second, those are reckless assumptions. No one knows what’s going on behind closed doors.”)
Kylie doesn’t play a famous game just as much as reporters might like. He doesn’t pack on PDAs on Instagram nor glare at the brilliance of his romances
Anyway, that’s how it went with poor Kylie. Like most women, she had a number of relationships as a serial monogamist. (Perhaps not like most women, each param was more like Adonis than the last: apart from Donovan, her boyfriends included Michael Hutchence, Lenny Kravitz, and Olivier Martinez.) Certain newspapers tend to list her exes in a neat chronological order; if the dates are to be believed, Minogue is not really one of the 2000s.
With the decay / natural finish / erasure, as appropriate, of any connection, the press seemed to be churning and sighing like an aunt desperately looking for an opportunity to pull out a wasted fascinator she bought in Debenhams in 2005. “Why is Kylie so unhappy in love? ? “The press would scream, choked with false concern, seemingly incapable of gathering the fact that the nation, a dear neighboring girl, could not find itself as a guardian.
In case you’re wondering where this came from, it’s true that Kylie doesn’t play the famous game just as much as reporters might like. He doesn’t pack on PDAs on Instagram or stare at glosses about his romances, leaving the tabloids without a story, ergo has no choice but to speculate about why he is so damn secret in his personal life.
Still, the nation’s days about Kylie-as-a-poor-singleton seem to be numbered. Actor Billie Piper released the cat from the bag earlier this month citing Kylie’s newest partner, Paul Solomons, as his fiancé. Also this week, the Daily Mail reported that Kylie and Solomons, 46, from Wales and creative director of GQ, are planning quiet wedding in her native Melbourne – although, according to Woman’s Day magazine, what was originally a covert affair “snowed” into something more extravagant. “She was completely caught in the moment,” the source said said Australian magazine.
What is the only reasonable reaction to that, so why not? If Kylie Minogue wanted a huge wedding and party with all the decorations, who would blame the 52-year-old for that? Kylie’s wholehearted festivities can finally lull the outdated arrogance of older brides who prefer to opt for a calm and modest celebration.
Anyway, Kylie’s married couple will officially tear down the curtain on Poor Kylie’s chapter. In the normal course of events, “maybe a baby” reports often follow. Maybe, given her age, Kylie would be spared that. Although certain parts of the media are involved, this will certainly not be due to a lack of attempts.